Pregnancy & postnatal expert & mother of two, Becca Maberly is the Founder of A Mother Place, a site which offers antenatal courses designed to prepare parents for pregnancy, birth & life with a new baby. This week her brand new book – Nobody Tells You – hit the shelves, so we caught up with her to find out more…
We had an early sneak peak & we can tell you, it’s an absolute gold mine of info, anecdotes & reassurance – a must-have for new or expecting parents!
First, tell us a bit about A Mother Place – What’s the Mission?
When I was pregnant with my first son, I was so lucky to have my dad, an Obstetrician at the end of the phone. It was amazing to have expert advice on tap throughout every trimester and to prepare me for my birth. I was like an A Grade student going in to ace my exam! However, there was a bit of a gap in my knowledge as I failed to prepare myself for what came after the birth!
I created A Mother Place because I wanted to make sure that no mother felt as alone as I did in those first few weeks, months and years. When I first had my son, I was so confused and angry that there seemed to be so much stuff surrounding birth and the postnatal period that nobody had told me about. Everything seemed to be shrouded in secrecy until you were actually a proper part of this mystical mum gang…and then suddenly people are dying to talk to you about their piles and postnatal depression! That’s great, but I wanted to know about this kind of thing before hand, so I could be prepared!
I created online courses to help prepare women and their partners. My wish is that new mums coming behind us embark on their parenting journey with their eyes wide open and armed with all the information and advice they need to for the nerve-wracking times ahead!
Now tell us about the book!
It’s called ‘Nobody Tells You’ and it’s a collection of over 100 honest stories about pregnancy, birth and parenthood. It covers everything that Nobody Tells you from infertility and miscarriage right through to giving birth and eventually going back to work AND everything in between! We have some amazing, brave, funny, sad and wonderful stories from the likes of Megan Rose Lane, Clemmie Telford, Anna Mathur and Cat Simms and amazing expert advice from Obstetrician Roger Marwood, who happens to be my dad!
It is inspired by my own frustration at the lack of honest information out there and I really hope it will become an invaluable guide to those who are thinking about becoming parents, already pregnant or have become parents recently.
There is no scaremongering, no sugar coating, just reassuring and practical advice alongside personal stories that prove there is no “right way” to do it!
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We love the bite-size format – perfect for dipping in & out of when you have a spare 5 minutes…
There are more than 100 different stories from men and women covering just about EVERYTHING you can think of from trying to conceive right through to going back to work after having a baby, and everything else in between!
Each story is accompanied by expert advice that explains any issues that are raised in the story and information about where to get help if you need it. Despite the difficult and sometimes heart-breaking subjects we cover, the book is very positive, uplifting and funny too!
How did you go about compiling the stories?
We have an absolutely amazing community on Instagram, @amotherplace, and everyone is so generous with sharing their stories, whatever the subject. When I decided to write the book I asked people to submit their stories and they just flooded in!
Did any of them hit particularly close to home for you? (Aside from your own, of course!)
Yes, the breastfeeding stories really hit home for me. I had a particularly difficult time feeding my babies and it was very emotional for me to read about the struggles that others went through too. I also suffered from a ruptured ectopic pregnancy a few years ago which went undiagnosed and almost killed me, so the story that we share about that is very personal to me.
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Having delivered over 5000 babies in his time, Roger Marwood provides invaluable medical insights to accompany the stories in the book. What was it like navigating your own pregnancies with him on the end of the phone?
I felt so lucky and so privileged to have access to such expert advice 24-7. All my friends were always on the phone too – they still are when they have any pregnancy related questions! When I set up our Online Antenatal Classes on A Mother Place, it was because I wanted to be able to share this resource with everyone else. I wanted everyone else to feel as confident and prepared as I did when I went into labour. And the online Postnatal Courses I launched more recently to help new mums in that nerve-wracking first year!
Lastly, any advice to share with new & expecting mamas?
It’s wonderful but it is also VERY hard work, but I think if you know about the tough stuff and you expect this, then often it will be better or easier than you thought. So be prepared, do your research. Understand how the human body is meant to work and how we are designed to give birth, but also understand that Mother Nature doesn’t always get it right, and if this happens to you then you do not need to be afraid. We have amazing doctors and nurses who can help deliver your baby safely.
You need to appreciate that your body and mind will change, not for the worse, but things will be different. If things don’t feel good for you after you have had a baby, then again, you do not need to worry as there is help and support out there for you whatever issues you are having. And above all, remember that however you are feeling, whatever you are going through, you are not alone.
You can find out more about Becca’s book & order your copy of ‘Nobody Tells You’ here.
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